Posted by
Arik on Thursday, January 08, 2009 10:07:13 PM
This movie, and I hesitate to call it a movie, is so bad my head hurts from watching it. The blurb says this movie is about three serial killers, but really, the woman lures the (good-looking, large-breasted, incredibly stupid) female victims out into the middle of nowhere, where the big fat guy kills them in various non-imaginative, not particularly interesting ways, then the black guy buries them (so I guess you have a serial lurer, a serial killer, and a serial undertaker). This is repeated 5 or 6 times, and then the "movie" ends. Seriously, that's all there is to it.
They took the disappearances of hundreds of women along the U.S.-Mexican border as an "inspiration," and extrapolated an entirely uninteresting, wholly unbelieveable, thoroughly nauseating and undeniably lousy work of trash. When they say "Based on Actual Events," they mean "Nobody knows what happened, so we're making up something completely unoriginal.
I believe the genre of this abomination is called 'splatterporn,' but there is pretty much no splatter, and the acting ability of the cast is not quite up to porn standards. Even the good-looking, large-breasted women keep their tops on, so it's a waste from that angle, as well. Seriously, folks, you could hand out video cameras to random high school students and come up with something better than this crap. I'm not opposed to a good slasher movie, or even a slasher movie that's so bad it's good, but this fails to live up to even those low expectations.
The cast is a bunch of unknowns who, judging from their work in this trash, will remain unknowns for the foreseeable future. The director, if one may be so bold as to call him that, is Ulle Lommel, who is apparently something of a legend in horror circles. The basis underlying that conclusion, I don't know, but if this movie is any indication, he is legendary for making historically unwatchable crap.
This cost me seven-fifty at Wal-Mart, and beyond the time spenting earning that money, the actual watching of this thing is an hour-and-a-half that I will never get back. Don't buy it. Don't rent it. Don't borrow it. Don't let friends watch it. If I were awarding stars, this one would owe me stars back. Ick.